Be it resolved?
When I make a New Year's resolution, I usually frame it in a way to guarantee success. Resolving to lose weight or to change a habit just seems too externally motivated, as if those extra pounds and that particular habit need correction to be socially normative. Instead, I'd rather enhance something I already do pretty well, especially if it's something I tend to neglect.
Back in 2000, I resolved to learn how to play bass guitar. That was a resolution I looked forward to doing. Other years, I resolved to write music, during times when I wasn't writing any. Last year, I casually resolved to release a CD. I didn't take it seriously and even forgot I made that resolution. And what should happen? I released a CD.
Yes, my resolutions tend to be creatively-inclined, and I like to think they helped spur me to do more.
I'm at the point now where I don't need to resolve to be creative. I have more than enough to keep me busy for years. So for 2009, I'm thinking about resolutions that might be significantly more challenging for me to achieve. In short, resolutions akin to losing weight or changing a habit.
I've narrowed the resolutions to a choice of three:
- Form a band
- Start dating again
- Learn to swim
For all the work I've been doing in the studio, the songs really need to come alive with real musicians playing the parts. I've been resistant so far because I just don't know jack shite about band logistics. I'm not even sure what my own role would be. And if I form one, then what? I'm not even that great a performer.
I almost think forming a band is a more intimate relationship than dating. I "took a break" from dating back in 1999, and I've been apathetic about it ever since. I used to think if I could muster the courage to form a band, I can muster the courage to date again. Both involve finding other people, but with dating, I'm not entrusting my creative work to someone else. Trust is the lynch pin in both situations, and dating looks slightly simpler than forming a band.
In a way, these two resolutions almost have a familial theme running through them, and that's a difficult idea for me to process. My model of a family -- id est, my own -- isn't inspiring, and the ultimate goal in dating is to find a partner. In short to form a family, even if it's only two people. I can't say I find that appealing. The interpersonal relationships in a band, I would imagine, run on the same dynamic. And I'm no patriarch.
As for the third resolution -- yes, I grew up on an island, and I don't know how to swim. Doesn't make sense. I'm thinking I might have the most fun with this resolution. It's certainly less intimidating than the other two, and it gives me an excuse to get in the water. Unless I drown. Then it would not be.
